Wednesday, June 30, 2010


To the 2 douche bags in the yellow & black Corvettes racing down Keller Springs…thanks for running the light at Knoll Trail and nearly causing me to wreck my new car...just to have to stop at the red light at the Tollway. I’m so sorry about your penises.


Tuesday, June 29, 2010

I blame Mother Nature, PMS, the rainy weather and raging hormones...

I am feeling a little emo this week and I think PMS & the weather have something to do with it. Some days it really sucks being a girl. Sometimes I wonder...if my Mr. Right is out there...everyone says he is… that he just hasn't found me yet. Well, he needs to get to steppin'...LOL! I guess I am feeling a little lonely…I am okay with being single. I don't need a man to make me happy; I want a man to be happy with. But once in a while I just miss the physical contact…someone to fall asleep with. Now I know if I just wanted to get laid I'd have no problem doing that. But in the end, I need/want/deserve more than that. I want to be wanted…desired...needed. After my last relationship ended, I took some time for me and to figure out what is important to me in a relationship. In all reality I don't ask for much. I'm pretty low maintenance, I think, when it comes to relationships. I prefer the little things…because they mean so much more. Now I know these days romantic men are extremely scarce…but they are out there. I want to find a man that will open the door for me, hold my hand in public. One that doesn't mind having nights in, because every now and then you need downtime. But, I want to find a man that doesn't mind being out & about either. Someone active...who will maybe run with me. One that realizes my family means everything to me and they tend to lean on me a lot...I am the strong one, and there are times I need someone I can lean on...and I want him to be that person. One that gets along with my friends, because when we are all together...we can get outa hand. Someone who can make me laugh...I have a weakness for funny guys and I love to laugh. I want to find a man who wants to be with me because I am me. One who doesn't try to change me...emotionally or physically. I am who I am...take it or leave it. I do not have the perfect body…a REAL woman has meat on her bones, is soft, has curves. There are days I don't wear make-up...or get all dressed up. But, I still have a lot to offer the right person. I know this...I am just waiting to find a man who can see it. I'd like to find someone who respects me. One who will tell me how beautiful he thinks I am & actually mean it...not just say it because he knows it is what I want to hear. SOmeone who will be honest with me...I hate lies & deceit. I don't need to be showered with gifts or wined & dined all the time. The things I want from a man are free. I see how some of my friends are treated in their doors are opened for them...they get foot massages every now & then when they’ve had had a long day... cards are left for them…little things like that. Doesn't cost a dime. And it isn't like I wouldn't do the same. It's in my nature to give...I can't help myself. But I find myself meeting guys lately who take it for granted. I just want to meet someone who makes me happy and vice versa. One who feels he never knew what he did with out me. I know he is out there somewhere...just not sure where... Ok...I am done and off my I feel better! LOL!

"Sometimes people put up walls, not to keep others out....but to see who cares enough to tear them down."

Thursday, June 17, 2010

My friends...

I am going to take a quick minute to say thank you to my friends for always being there for me and loving me no matter what. For helping me see that I do not give myself enough credit and that I shouldn't settle for 2nd best. I have the greatest friends in the world and I am so blessed. Sometimes I feel like I could never repay them, but they know I would do anything for them. I would like to tell you a little about each one.

First there is Angie. I have known this woman since I was around 8 years old. So 25 years or so. My family moved in across the street from her when I was in 2nd grade. Angie is 2 years older than me, but her mom made her play with me anyway since I didn't know anyone. LOL. I remember my brother would ALWAYS pick on me and for the most part she'd defend me. But sometimes I was the little sister she didn't have...chasing me around with a basket full of Locust KNOWING I'm deathly afraid of bugs...LOL. Then of course there was the teasing and picking on me...I'd take my toys and go home...but I always came back. As we got older & matured, so did our friendship. I moved away to Dickinson, she spent the summer with me. After I graduated high school I spent the summer with her, she had just had her daughter. Then I moved back to Dallas & she welcomed me into her home. I will never forget that. It eventually took a toll on friendship and we didn't speak for a couple of years. But true friends never really leave. I thought and worried about her everyday. I wanted nothing but happiness for her. Then a friend of ours got us together...and the rest was history. Angie is the one person I know on this earth I can tell absolutely ANYTHING to and she will not judge or discriminate. She will only say her opinion and offer support. So to are the sister God and fate forgot to give me. I love you...and your family. And I thank you for welcoming me into you house & family with open arms.

Then there is Zak and Dustin. Both of whom I could not do without! They are special to me for so many reasons. I met Zak through our friend Kelli. The minute I met him I knew we'd be friends. He is full of talent (have you seen his photography?) and knowledge...I wish I had a pinky full of some of it...Zak has such a giving heart; he'd do anything for someone he loves. We have spent so many days & nights on my couch vegging out watching movies...or playing Phase 10. He is so open minded and non-judgmental, it feels good knowing I can confide in him. I wouldn't give him up for anything and I only hope we are friends for the rest of our days. He has the greatest family whom I love to pieces. His mom is a hoot when she does Jell-O shots...LOL! He has moved to St. Louis to be with his partner Will (who is also VERY special to me) and even though I do not get to see him as much as I’d like, I know he is happy and that is all that matters to me. Zak, thank you so much for being my friend. For hanging out with me, keeping me company, and most of all for just being you...the wonderful, amazing, talented, and beautiful person you are.

I met Dustin through Zak. I had seen him on Zak's MySpace page before...but met him in person at the Hideaway while Zak was bartending there. He popped in for a drink and we chatted a bit. I don't remember what we talked about; I just remember laughing...a lot! We chatted on MySpace a bit, and then met for a happy hour one day. It was down hill from there. Dustin is a great friend to have. We are alike in so many ways it’s scary. You can never be with him and NOT have a great time. He sees humor in everything. And he is a great should check out his blogs! He had moved to Seattle for a while, which took a toll on me. I missed him. But, I knew the new job and new town is what he needed at the time. I am so glad he is back in DFW! I want nothing but the best for him. Anyone that can call him a friend is a very lucky person. He'd give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. So Dustin, even though you're back in the Big D and traveling all the time for work, you are still so very special to me. I am blessed to have your friendship. I miss you, but know you are the Weizer to my Clarie and I look forward to us being crazy old cat ladies together!

I have made some new friends over the last year or so and love the diversity each of them brings to our friendship. My DRC ladies…I could NOT have made it through the past 2 training seasons without you. You all were there for me when my relationship ended and helped me run out the sadness and tears every Saturday morning, Tuesday & Wednesday nights. The Tuesday runs at Nirisha’s with dinner to follow were life savers for me at the time. You helped me see I am completely capable of doing amazing things on my own! I enjoyed seeing all of us accomplish our training goals and am looking forward to the fall training season with all of you again! To my newer friends Stacy, Melissa and Amy…you girls are awesome and so much fun to be with. Thank you to Stacy for willing to run the Katy Trail and the Cowtown Half with me at a slower pace than she is used to just to push me and make me hit my goals. And thank you always having an open ear & heart when I'd doubt myself. I hope I can repay the favor someday. And thank you for willing to try & teach me to really swim and making me think one day I may do a triathlon! You never know! Thank you Amy for always being up for girl’s night at my house and being there to listen when I need it. I am happy to return the favor anytime you need it. Melissa…we’ve hung out a lot lately and I enjoy every minute of it! You remind me of myself in so many ways and are always there to listen & cheer me up if needed. I love our volleyball games and sailing on the weekends! I am glad you are my person, that you are my Christina Yang. I hope our friendship continues to grow. Let's hug it out!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

22 ways to make me smile...

If you truly know me you know I've said a hundred times before...I prefer the little things. Here are some little things in a relationship that make me (and my heart) smile...the ones in purple get me every time...

1. Tell her she is beautiful or gorgeous (not fine, or sexy)

2 . Hold her hand at any moment...even if it’s just for a second.

3 . Kiss her on the forehead/neck.

4 . Leave her voice messages to wake up to.

5 . When she is upset, hold her tight and tell her how much she means to you.


7 . Pick her over all the other girls you hang out with.

8 . Write her notes. (she loves them)

9 . Introduce her to family and your girlfriend.

10 . Play with her hair.

11 . Pick her up, tickle her, and play-wrestle with her.

12 . Sit in the park and just talk to her.

13 . Tell her funny jokes, tell her stupid jokes, or just tell her jokes.

14 . Let her fall asleep in your arms.

15 . If she's mad at you, kiss her.

16 . Give her piggyback rides.

17 . Bring her flowers.

18 . Treat her the same around your friends as you do when you’re alone.

19 . Look her in the eyes and smile.

20 . Let her take as many pictures of you as she wants.

21 . Kiss her in the rain.

22 . If you’re in love with her...tell her.

And if you wanted to score extra points...

a) Snuggle with her & watch a movie

b) Kiss her for no reason

c) Open the door for her

d) Offer to bring her dinner or take her out so she doesn't have to cook

e) Make it known you're interested in her

Friday, June 4, 2010

My hero…My Daddy

If you truly know me, you know I am a complete daddy's girl. I have been from the day I was born. I am very close to my dad and consider him my best friend. There really isn't much I can't talk to him about. I am very lucky...most people I know are not close to their parents. Mine are my best friends and biggest supporters.

It was around 4 years ago that I was reminded you can not assume your loved ones will be around forever. My dad has not been a healthy man most of my life. In 1988 he had triple bypass open heart surgery and was diagnosed with congestive heart failure. In 1998 he had a triple angioplasty to unblock the 3 veins he received in his bypass surgery 10 years before. In 2001 he had another heart attack and was told they would not do surgery because his heart could not take it, so for the past 9 years it has been treated medically. About 14 or 15 years ago he was diagnosed with Peripheral Neuropathy in his lower legs & feet. Definition: peripheral neuropathy refers to the variety of conditions that result when the nerves from the rest of the body that connect to the brain and spinal cord are damaged or diseased. Basically, he can't feel his feet & lower legs. So, if he cuts his foot or bangs his leg into something he won't feel it, and won't realize it is there until he sees blood or a bruise.

Four years ago my dad stepped on what I think was a nail (from the look of the wound), didn't know right away, noticed blood and/or puss in his sock, and started treating it at home with Epson salt, peroxide and Neosporin. Now, in the past this has worked for him when he had sores on his feet. This time he was not so lucky. He went to our family doctor on a Friday and his foot had gotten so red & swollen, our doctor was shocked. So what does the doctor do? He tested him for diabetes...guess what? Yep...he has it. And most likely has for as long as he's had the Neuropathy...for both diseases generally coincide with each other. I took him to the ER and he was quickly admitted. Tests, x-rays and blood work was done again and again.

The surgeons spoke to us to tell us what had to be done. The 2nd toe (one next to the big toe) was for sure being amputated. Once they did that, they would be able to see how deep & how high the infection went in his foot. IF the infection went higher than the toe, they said they'd have to amputate his foot below the toes. He'd still have most of his foot, just a partial part missing. IF it went higher than that, they'd amputate mid-calf. So, of course, we think the worse not knowing any better. And we wouldn't know until he was IN surgery. Without a doubt it was one of the worst nights of my life. Not to mention his. I couldn't imagine what he was feeling & thinking. My dad is a very strong man, doesn't show emotion. In my 33 years of life I've seen him cry 2 or 3 times...when his mother (my Nana) died, and when our dogs Prissy and Girl died. Well, I saw him cry that night. And it totally broke my heart. This is my hero. The type of man I hope I find...caring, strong, giving, and trusting. My dad is everything to me...always has been, always will be.

They ended up only taking the one toe. The infection had gone a little higher, but IV antibiotics did the trick in getting rid of it rather than more amputation. His left foot is what we now call his problem foot. He gets wounds and has to go to the wound care clinic weekly to make sure the infection doesn’t spread. We are fighting one right now that the doctors suggest be skin graphed because of the size and placement. Naturally, he is concerned with the healing process with his diabetes.

My point to all of this rambling is to not take for granted those you love. They may not be here tomorrow. It is a known fact everyone dies. You will lose those you love. But while you do have them here, make the most of it. And definitely make sure they know how much you care. I tell my dad everyday I love him…my mom too.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Watch out! I'm here!

Well, I decided I wanted to start blogging. Big whoop right? I know. But it is something I've always wanted to do, just never have. My blogs will not change the world or promote world peace. I'm sure there will be tons of typos and possible misspellings and bad grammar. Get over it! I will most likely be too lazy to fix it. They will be random ramblings from a girl who runs, drinks beer, reads, and falls down/cuts/burns herself a lot. Enjoy!